Dr. Fran’s Top 10 Tips For Managing Your Temper
- Deal with your anger in the moment. The build-up and surprise factor is the scariest part for your child.
- When angry, remove yourself, take a short cool-down time, then return and deal with the situation directly and in a calm manner.
- Refrain from verbal putdowns, berating, or spewing hostilities to your child (or spouse). Make this a solemn commitment.
- As you recognize and accept anger as a natural, normal human emotion, accept it in your child. Invite your child to tell you about it openly.
- Talk about feelings with your child. Embrace anger as just another acceptable feeling.
- Set and hold boundaries matter of factly, rather than with a flurry of anger.
- Work on extending your tolerance for delayed gratification. Be patient. Your child will comply only if you are supportive and on their team.
- Teach your child to always tell you the truth. Assure him that you will work on not getting so angry because you love him and do not want to scare him.
- Know that you are a model for your children. Your child will think, “If Daddy explodes, why shouldn’t I?”
10. Be kind to yourself. Know this is a process, not a quick fix. Be sure to hold on to your motivation to raise happy, healthy, disciplined, loving children.